Tag Archives: anger

Why am I an Angry Mom: An Article that has given me PEACE

As parents we expect a lot of our kids, but perhaps it isn’t our kids we are expecting a lot from. It’s us. I don’t know about you but I did not get a manual when I brought my first kid home. And it just got more complicated as we brought home more kids. I love my children, and I have taken parenting classes, read books, and I try so very hard to be perfect for them. But EVERY kid is different, and nothing can truly prepare you for it ALL.

I recently came across this blog, A Mother Far From Home. It featured an article entitled “Why Am I an Angry Mom?” I never thought of myself as an angry mom. I do have a short temper, and I have very active and busy kids. So when it gets to be too much I have noticed — I yell. I had a Dad that yelled, and I remember flinching when he was mad. His voice was so loud and he seemed so mad I thought he was mad at me. It wasn’t until I yelled when my daughter dropped something in the kitchen (cheerios people, everywhere) and saw her flinch that I realized what I had viewed as my Dad being mad at me was just him being annoyed that there was more work to do. So I took a step back. And when I saw this article I realized that I wasn’t alone in my reactions. But perhaps, with a little help, I could find a new way to react.

I’m not saying I am perfect now, and I am not saying you will be either. But I am saying it has helped me to recognize when I need to step back and react differently. I hope that it helps some of you too!

Book Review : Yell Less, Love More

Parenting can be hard. We try so hard to be the best, be the ones to be that model parent you see on television. But it doesn’t always go that way. We aren’t all super parents, we cannot be perfect. We are human. I have had a hard time coming to terms with that. As a busy mom I find myself sometimes trying to do it all and then berating myself, and my kids, when it doesn’t go the way I imagine it going. So here I am ready to share my story. I am a mom, and I yell.

My father was a “yeller” when I was a kid. My mother was not. She always had this calm manner about her, even when disciplining us. I thought that was incredible. I thought that would be me. But I did not take after my mother, I too after my father.  I yelled at my daughter in front of a friend one day, and she told me about a book that had helped her stop yelling at her kids. I was intrigued. So I picked one up, Yell Less, Love More: How the Orange Rhino Mom Stopped Yelling at Her kids and How you Can Too! Yell less, love more and its 30-day guide was going to be my lifesaver. I am now 10 days in going strong. But let me tell you. It has been way more than 10 days.

Yell less, love more book

The author Sheila McCraith shares her own story of being a “yeller” she also gives incredibly useful tips (and some incredibly not useful ones at least for me)  for keeping that yelling voice at bay. She recommends starting over every time you slip and yell. I have, three times. But each time I have gone a little further without yelling. I have discovered that not yelling is mostly about me, it is about how calm and ready I am to handle my day, my kids, and my own temper.

My kids do not provoke me. I am escalating my own anger. It can be escalated by impatience and a bad day, but that is not my children’s fault. So why should I let them bear the brunt of my frustrations? Sheila is helping me to let go of that, and I am hoping to make it to the full 30-days soon. In the mean time this book is helping me to develop a belt full of tools to make yelling a little easier to let go. Check it out if you have some of the same issues, or know someone who does. It is indeed a useful tool. Feel free to join the movement and learn more about it here and learn to “yell less, love more”.