Tag Archives: teaching

Teaching Your Child: What Type of Learner is Your Child?

Every child is different, so is every parent. I learned this on day one. I have more than one kid, and I have been doing this for a while. But guess what? It never gets easier. My kids may look like near carbon copies of one another (I apparently make one type of kid, I swear they look like twins 4 years apart, minus the fact they are different genders) they are absolutely nothing alike. One is the easiest going kid you will ever meet. Is polite, outgoing, brave, ready to learn, and learns very quickly. Once is shy, a momma’s boy, takes his time to warm up to new places, situations, and people, and is smart but works more methodically. They couldn’t be more different. Its ok. It just make for a change in my parenting style with each kid. Any parent that tells you that one style works for every child, has never had more than one child. Everyone is different. I also have a very different relationship with each child. Which is ok too. My daughter is my partner. We work together, she learns alongside me as we play, work in the yard, cook, clean, workout, and read. My son needs a teacher, a mentor, someone who stands over him and guides him. It doesn’t mean he isn’t as smart, it doesn’t mean I think he needs more help. it is just the way in which he absorbs knowledge.

I taught Special Education for years before staying home to be with my own children. It helped me see that every child is different. I truly think it guided me to understand that I have no control over my kids. They are who they are. I am simply guiding them to be the best version of who they are.

When I work with them I play to their strengths and weaknesses. My daughter shadows me to learn. She has already begun clearing her own dinner from the table, making her bed, and helping to do the dishes and cook meals. She watches what we do, and she replicates it. We make sure to model things at her level. When she sees how easy it is to do something, she goes ahead and tries. By doing this with her we have shown her how to begin taking care of her own mess, and even make her own snacks. We have moved all of her food to the lowest level of cupboards and created a snack and utensil area at just her level. Now she does things for herself.

My son needs more one-on-one interaction. When we teach him a new skill we repeat it over and over. We make it a game. each step leads to the next. He even gets a sticker reward when he completes each task. This has helped him figure out how to dress himself and put away his toys.

Self-Sufficiency is a lesson that we teach everyday of our children’s lives. It doesn’t end at a specific stage. But if you find your child’s learning queues you can make it easier for everyone involved. Take a few days to watch and observe your kids. Do they need more help, less help, do they do things on their own, do they need extra motivation? No matter what type of learner they are you can help them. Just remember not to put to much pressure on yourself, being a parent is hard. But it can also be very rewarding. Especially when you can sit on the couch and watch your child get their own snack while you take a five minute break.

Friendship: Books About Friends

Friendship is such a  fundamental part of our lives as humans. We cultivate relationships from the moment we are born until the day we die. Friendship is one of the most important relationships we will ever have. So it isn’t surprising that we sometimes need a little help understanding why we need friends, and how to treat our friends. One of the great ways we can teach our children about friendship is through modeling. We model how a friend should be treated and appreciated through our own behavior. Another great way to teach children about friendships is through fun and simple books. The following books make the interaction fun, interesting, and is presented on a child’s level.

Books About Friends

This great book, The Way Back Home by Oliver Jeffers follows a little boy as he rockets in to space and lands on an alien planet where he is stranded. The only other living being there is a small martian. Together the two develop a fabulous plan to fix their spacecraft and return home. They not only repair the spacecraft, they develop a friendship that changes them.

In conclusion:

This fun book is playfully illustrated with child-like stick drawings that speak to the reader and help to rekindle that child-like innocence. It is perfect for reading with a parent, sibling, or for a child to read alone. The emotions expressed are universal, and will help to show just how important friendship really is in this world.

4 Helpful Hints When Disciplining Your Kids

Recently I have noticed my little one has been testing limits. Mine, Dad’s, even their own. We do not like to spank unless it is an issue of personal safety. The child reached out to touch a fire, tried to pick up a knife from the dining room table (the knife set for someone else’s place at dinner.) only in instances in which we want to make a very substantial memory that this was a very bad thing to do. But when it comes to daily events like misbehaving, climbing furniture, throwing toys, etc. we tend to use timeout or discussing what the behavior was and why it was wrong. But with the recent increase in misbehavior we have all grown a little impatient, annoyed, and aggravated and I have noticed that we are doing more yelling than I want my child to hear, or have directed at them. It is beginning to feel more like we are seeking to punish instead of teach and discipline.

I catch myself yelling because I am angry. I use a sharp tone because I am impatient and cannot believe this behavior is still going on. My child knows better. I have taught them better. But they are still kids, they are young, they are learning, and learning means doing things over and over again. I know all this, yet it still find myself losing my patience far too often. So what can we as parents do when we are behaving more like our children, yelling in anger, snapping with impatience, and seeking to punish instead of teach? We need to talk a breath, relax, find a calmer place, and try once more to teach. But it may mean we need a few lessons ourselves.

Helpful Hints

Your toddler son is playing in the living room stacking cups one on top of the other. When suddenly you no longer hear the soft kathunk of the cups landing on top of one another and begin to hear the splashing sound of water being poured from one cup to the other, and then all over the hardwood floor. You begin to see red. Your anger rises, your jaw tightens and you just can’t hold back the yell of “no do not do that!” What do you do? Take a step back, breathe deep, and think of something calm. Yes there is now water all over your clean floor, the stacking cups will need cleaning and drying, but is it the end of the world? No. You look at your son and ask, ” is that how we play with our cups? Do we use water in them? Why not? Because they get the floor all wet and that is bad because someone could slip and fall from the water.”

1. Take a deep breath. Relax. You want your words to resonate with your child, you want to teach why this behavior is wrong. You don’t want to scare them or punish them for being bad. They aren’t bad, they are showing bad behavior. You don’t want to punish or scare the child, you want to teach the lesson of why this behavior is unacceptable, and show that if done again it will be dangerous.
2. Discipline from a place of anger does not teach your child what they did was wrong. It shows them that when things don’t go right you should be angry, and rude and act out. Which is not the behavior we want them to exhibit, so why do it ourselves. Take a deep breath and think about the situation. It was a mistake, people learn from mistakes, make this a teaching moment to show that although people can make a mistake, they can make it better by trying to fix the mistake or clean up after it. Get a towel and get your child to help clean the mess.
3. Allow your child the chance to explain what happened. Listen. Hear their reasoning, explain why this was the wrong thing to do, even if they think it was just for fun it could still cause a problem for someone else which is not fun.
4. Don’t seek to punish. Get your child to help clean up, explain why it is a bad idea to play with water in this way. Then when they are done and are once again back at play later in the day do not continue to be upset or punish them for what happened. What’s done is done, they do not deserve to be treated badly for the rest of the day. The mistake has happened, been rectified, and forgotten.bringing it up over and over to punish the child is only hurtful to the child and makes them resentful. We want to build our children up, not tear them down.

In the heat of the moment it can be difficult to stop how we are feeling and thinking and try to be understanding and good teachers but it is important for us to show this behavior so that when our children are placed in similar situations they can see how they are supposed to react. Do you have any other ideas or tips that help you in situations like this?

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