Tag Archives: toddler

Are your Kids: Spoiled? Unspoiled? Just Kids?

We all have heard it at least once as a parent. Your kid is spoiled. But what does that mean? Is our kid really spoiled? Or is someone witnessing your child on a bad day? We all have bad days. We all have moments where we can act entitled, privileged, and snobby. But does that mean we are spoiled?

My son was recently witnessed on a very bad day. He was with me in the store. We had been shopping all day. We did a LARGE Costco run, we ran to the Bank, we ran to the Dollar Store, we took his sister to school, we attended a meeting for the PTA, and we finished it all off at Toys R Us. Bad idea, I know. But it was my daughter’s birthday weekend. We were picking up last minute items for her party, including her brand new bike. While we were in the store my 1 1/2 year old son who was very tired, had not napped for longer than a car ride all day, had not eaten since lunch (nearly two hours prior) and was physically and emotionally spent with errand day, spotted a brand new truck. holding my hand as he followed along he reached out to grab the truck. Sorry little man, not today, I sadly explained. That was the last straw for my poor little guy. Meltdown central began.

He let go of my hand and threw himself flat on the tile floor in the middle of Toys R Us and proceeded to throw a tantrum that would make the Academy want to award him a little gold statue. An older woman walked by and smiled at me, the she frowned at my son. Who had begun kicking while spinning on the ground, crying out-loud “want, truck, want truck!” I was exhausted myself, ready to be done for the day so I could take my daughter to baseball practice and finally go home to bake for her party. I wanted to scream, I wanted to yell, but I didn’t. Instead I bent down, picked him up, hugged him, gave him a bug kiss, and said “you really want that truck don’t you?” He sobbed, nodded, and laid his little head on my shoulder. The lady warned me. Do not give in to him. He is spoiled, he should not be rewarded with a truck for throwing a tantrum. Listen to me I have three grown children.

I understood her advice. I listened. I smiled. But I knew that my son had also had a long day. He had not been difficult until that moment. He was sweet in the other stores. Quiet at the bank. And still had to go sit through his sisters 1 1/2 hour baseball practice in the cold wind before going home to eat dinner and get ready for bed. I knew he needed something to keep him distracted, entertained, and lets face it, keep me sane. I reached for the truck and took it right to the checkout.

I know! I must be insane. I am spoiling my kids. But really, am I? My son stopped crying. He followed me closely to the checkout. He didn’t cry or speak again until he was happily strapped in his carseat. I unwrapped he truck and handed it to him. His face lit up, “truck!” he happily uttered. And for the entire time at baseball he played happily. Now I do not routinely I’ve in to tantrums. But, I do not feel this tantrum was truly a tantrum. Kids are just like us. they feel fatigue, they feel overwhelmed, and they are not always able to regulate those emotions as well as adults. I knew my son was at his emotional wits end. He was overwhelmed with his long day. I got down to his level, affirmed his feelings, hugged him to let him know I understood and it was ok. Sometimes we all just need to know there is someone out there who gets it. It doesn’t mean we are spoiled. It just means we are human. and after all, some of us are just kids.

Family Photos: Tips for Making Them Easier!

Family photos can be fun to do, but if you have a toddler or young kids they can be a little daunting. You want to remember the moment in time forever. But it can be difficult to get through a traditional sitting with a photographer when your kids are young or unpredictable. So what is the best advice we can give you? Embrace the unpredictable. Embrace the way your family is right now.

Dad and child family photos 861a1d7440c16eb72b406e37cfd472c7 4f7e7bae5deb3dcda3d1f032e5a7c0dfDo you have a toddler? Do they throw tantrums? Cry? Scream? Kids fighting? Let them. Laugh at it. and snap that moment in time. Photos that are candid are much more fun, exciting, and real! In twenty years you will smile and laugh and remember everything fondly so why not just show it as it was? What will make you smile and laugh more twenty years form now? The fact that you had a screaming three year old or that everyone has a blank and step ford appearance?

Embrace the chaos of the day. If your kids are acting wild and want to run and play then choose an outdoor setting or let them play and dance and have fun. The photo will reflect their bright and fun personalities much more if you capture them being them instead of sitting still with their hands crossed.

Wear clothes that are comfortable and easy to move, sit, and be happy in. I have seen very few kids happy to be in a four piece suit or itchy tights through anything let alone an hour or two of photos. Think clothes that they will enjoy wearing and be comfortable in for an extended period of time.

Just remember photos are a memory, and why remember something fake when you can remember something fun and real?

Toddler Moments: The Threenager

All parents know what I am talking about. You have all at one point tried to control or deal with a toddler. Its an inevitable stage in development. We cannot avoid it. Everyone warns us about the terrible twos, and the terrible teenager years. But no one warns you about the terrible threes. You escape the twos pretty much unscathed and think, I have made it! I’m free. It wasn’t that terrible, my kid must be the easiest two year old ever! Then you hit three and the Terrible Threenager emerges.

We skipped the terrible twos. I think that my two year old plotted to make three even worse. I like to call this the threenager stage because the fights all seem to be about control, being in charge , and being independent. I can see their teenage years looming ahead and think good god I can’t go through it again! But I will try to find a way to make it through, after all, what other option is there? Threenagers like to exert their own willpower, they like to think they are in control of everything we do. And they think everything is theirs by right. We have spent our week fighting over the power, but in the end we have found the best way to deal has been to give them small moments of power and control. We are slowly tricking them in to thinking they have the power (even though we never give it up). Options are our best ally. Would you like to eat chicken or beef for dinner? What outfit looks best for school today? This or that? limited options work best.

What coping mechanisms do you use to get through the day with your toddler?

Who else can relate to this moment?

The Threenager